2011 - Manu 'Won Jin'

The reason why you come to and stay at a place is sometimes a funny futility.

About fifteen years ago, that body sometimes practiced meditation at a Soto Zen center in Soho. But because that body was lazy, it once looked for a place closer to home. That’s how, one day, it passed the door of the Chogye International Zen Center on 14th Street. The teacher who guided that body was a quirky fellow named Paul, and that body had no idea it would come to love him so much later. Everything at that temple was as weird as the Soho center. But one thing was different: during walking meditation, instead of the usual boring slow-motion pace, it was at a normal pace. As a body with low tolerance for boredom, it liked that. So it came back.

Soon, it met a very handsome guy, the Head Dharma Teacher. He was so welcoming and kind, and when he learned the body was Spanish too, he said they were probably related, and the body wanted to believe him. Later came kong-ans, interviews, and a teacher named Steve who was super scary. But this body, stubborn as it is, returned again and again, driven by the will to overcome its fear of Steve.

So why did this body -- my body -- finally get hooked and stay at that tiny apartment temple? Maybe because it was lazy, maybe because it hated boredom, maybe because the Head Dharma Teacher was handsome and a fantasized Spanish relative, or maybe because it wanted to impress Steve. Probably a little bit of all that.

The funny thing is that the first kong-an I passed, it was with that much-talked-about Steve. That day, he looked soooo happy, and I suddenly realized that everyone there was just there to help me and support my practice. Handsome Nick became, over the years, one of the most important people in my Zen life, a true Dharma brother I can always count on, even beyond any Spanish DNA sharing or not.

Since the beginning of my Sangha life, many people took care of me, starting with several generations of Johns: John Holland, who literally took me under his wing with his unique kindness, and the long-time resident John S., one of my first buddies who invited me to join the Saturday brunch crew. My Sangha at that time was named Gautam, Clare, Myong Jin, Richard… as well as Matt and Soo and their baby Solly.

I also felt a special connection with two older guys with a unique sense of humor: Willie and Chris. Somehow, we may have shared a hidden thread we didn’t even know about, as many years later the three of us would follow John Holland’s path by taking the Bodhisattva vows.

And then, time flew. I saw new faces arrive, including a beloved one I would call my “Dharma twin,” because we happily shared the same Dharma name and almost the same birthdate. Little by little, I started taking responsibilities and helping others in turn. That’s how, one day, I happened to give a meditation intro to a young, discreet woman who would later become our wonderful and well-known kitchen master.

Over the years, I saw many residents come and go. I saw two fellow practitioners become Zen teachers, and one beloved Zen teacher become a Zen master. When he asked me to give a speech at his transmission ceremony in homage to our special bond, it was one of the greatest honors of my life.

Countless adventures with the Sangha have filled my life at the temple: a couple of 100-day ceremonies and weddings, many 49-day ceremonies, happy events, and also loss and death.

2023 was particularly intense: at the beginning of that year I had to say goodbye to Chris, and later that same year a new resident arrived who would become a very special and unique Dharma sister, so deeply precious to my heart.

And that is how, decades after that first step, this body is still here. Both Spaniards now have white hair, and baby Solly is almost an adult. Meanwhile, Sangha life goes on, with newcomers becoming regulars who welcome new newcomers…

Oh, and also: a new generation of Johns has appeared too.